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The Problem

Even though I have a good set of goals I'm passionate about, and no matter what I try - despite of occasional, temporary periods of relative success, I always get back to a state of passiveness, laziness, computer/TV addiction and extreme procrastination.

What Have I Tried

For about 10+ years I tried to change this, using -

And also just taking the time (an hour or a year) to get away and rethink my life.

But as mentioned, while all of these really helped, non of them managed to create a real, long-term life change.

Possible Solution

I know there's a solution to this - a training program or a set of actions I can do that will allow me to really become a different person. And I do understand this is something I have to train hard for, not an instant revolution. But I'm having a real problem figuring out what this set of actions is, as I've already tried many things, many times.

I'm also having a very hard time 'believing' new methods, books and ideas in this area, as none of them has worked as I wanted it to. But I do believe real people. I always find real life stories more inspiring than anything else, as they show not only concepts but a living proof that those concepts actually work.


The Question

What real life stories have been published about a long-term change of this nature? (In books, movies, blogs, videos, etc.)

(or)

What training programs with a real proof of effectiveness have been published?

By change, I mean a person that was once passive, and then actively changed her life in the long term. For that matter, self-help books / methods by people who have actually always been able to achieve goals might not help, as they won't prove change.

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closed as too broad by AsheeshR, THelper, Rory Alsop Mar 22 at 13:30

There are either too many possible answers, or good answers would be too long for this format. Please add details to narrow the answer set or to isolate an issue that can be answered in a few paragraphs.If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

    
Asking for books or stories that have been published is not on topic here - really, you can easily find them yourself. There are millions. As unity said, you seem to be focusing on the wrong thing though. You don't need books or training programs. You just need to want to do it. –  Rory Alsop Mar 22 at 13:32
1  
If it was as easy as wanting to do it we'd all be doing it all the time.There is something beyond just wanting. There is a question buried in here. Granted its not well formed. But I would guess it is something like this. How do you bridge the gap between timidity and daring? You can vision, clarify, organize and reflect all you want, but how do you actually jump into action? You have to be willing to be vulnerable. You have to be willing to face risk and put yourself out there. You can't know how much defeat or victory is in store but understand you need both.Read Darring Greatly:Berne BRown –  manuelhe Mar 23 at 4:45
    
@manuelhe Go ahead and edit the question. Improve the phrasing, and extract the real problem turning it into something specific, and not an overly broad "How do I become productive" question. Closing doesnt mean the question is over, just that it needs to be improved and focused. –  AsheeshR Mar 23 at 12:40
    
I see that the question is not well formed, but it does draw some interesting attention. Will someone be willing to help phrase it differently, so it might become more on-topic? I'm not sure how. –  Roy Mar 23 at 13:45

4 Answers 4

A very inspiring and impressive story is the one of Leo Babauta, which documented the change of his life in his blog http://www.zenhabits.net which became very famous.

His central point is, that you have to change your habits to change your life.

How to do that, he describes in his blog (see e.g. http://zenhabits.net/change/), and he also gives a lot of examples from his life.

The main achievements of his life change are listed in his blog as "my story"

  • quit smoking
  • started running and now even runs marathons
  • wakes up early
  • became organized
  • lived more healthy
  • became vegetarian
  • increased his income, eliminated his debt
  • created a several successful blogs
  • lost weight

...

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Eric Thomas is a brilliant example of this.

  • He didn't finish secundary school.
  • He was homeless.
  • He got kicked out at home.

Then he started to take his life seriously.

  • He was the first person to finish secundary school in his family
  • He went on to get a college degree, a masters degree and eventually a PHD
  • He now makes over 10000 dollars an hour as a motivational speaker (go look at his videos)
  • He wrote two books, of which one is in the bestsellers list in 5 countries.
  • He now owns 2 homes.
  • He goes all over the world to speak.
  • He just started his own university.

Most importantly: He does what he loves, all day, every day. He is my idol, which says a lot considering he's also a minister now.

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with inspiration and desire, working is easy. anybody who desired could finish his project like drinking a cup of tea.

they are feelings, and they are fine. like when you get hungry, eating is nice for your health.IF YOU're NORMAL of course, not for an obese one.you very skinny? to be healthier, you need to eat man and care your diet even if you don't want to. and after get normal weight, now you can trust your feelings and stay healthy.

so now, you are only checking diet recipes, you also need to eat man and exercise.methods designed for people who don't have activation issue. only when you're in action they're useful.looks like your feelings are corrupted just like mine. their guide is wrong and seeking for inspiration is like looking for watching someone who enjoy his dinner. not a cool solution i think. use your will and do man, the best is gaining your weigths with doing it as much as you can.

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Have a higher purpose.

No - 'goals' will not do.

See, you are lazy. That's what YOU are telling us.

Which means that ALL of the 'goals' you set combined, are NOT able to provide enough drive for you to get up and move.

Which is, as far as my experience shows, probably a textbook case of lack of higher purpose in an individual which is sufficiently conscious.

For almost all of the world population, 'goals' generally end up stuff that are picked from the desires and inclinations of the society in general - a good career, a happy marriage, a safe or accomplished life, summer house by age 50, seeing the world, traveling, friends, this that....

Even though this 'societal goals' set is very large and some of the topics in there may seem quite high and elated, they actually aren't.

Because none of them tend to be higher purposes.

A higher purpose is something that comes from the deep recesses of your subconscious. It is something which seeks to participate in and better your society, even humanity in a way that is unique to your own subconscious world and your own characteristics.

Look at Jane Goodall, who labored in African jungle for years to help people understand gorillas, and protect them.

Look at Albert Schweitzer, who incessantly labored in order to heal people in conditions far lower than his socioeconomic status.

Possible to make a huge list of such people who had unbelievable drive for accomplishing things seemingly impossible.

No - i'm not telling you to become an Albert Schweitzer, Jane Goodall or etc.

Why do you need this thing ?

Its so simple - since you are here, asking such questions, having implemented such methods, apparently working in an affluent field which requires intellect, you are obviously not stupid, dumb, incapable or inert.

You ALSO have such a drive inside you somewhere, which would make you wake up every morning - a drive that is small, or big.

Though hard to discover since its unique to every different individual, once you discover it, become aware of it, and set out a plan to walk in its direction, you will see that you not only have the drive to walk, but also have the energy to walk even against considerable odds.

Its weird, its sometimes illogical, sometimes inexplicable to your social circle or your friends or anyone who may not understand and be content with the conformism of daily life and societal goal subsets they were offered.

But if you are an ounce of smart, you cannot do without it.

Find what is yours.

It may be establishing a self-sufficient local community in 10 years, it may be teaching skills to homeless and unemployed, it may be writing a book in something you know best, it may be creating an open source p2p infrastructure for something....

When you find and set your higher purpose into action, you will see that all the peripheral bull...., including working for peripheral stuff to walk towards that goal (earning a living, tasks, social interactions, anything) will become MUCH easier, and you will have much more drive to walk.

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I see why you've got the impression I'm only looking for a way to live through an empty existence while the problem is the emptyness itself. But actually this is not very true in my case. I've been volunteering in several places, in my country and in the world, for years, and this is also my intention for the whole next year, in Africa. I have lots of dreams not only for me but for my community and for the world. But getting into a day-to-day productive lifestyle which will allow me to make those dreams real is the main problem. –  Roy Mar 22 at 15:21
    
Not at all - if you check what i wrote again, you will see that it also accounts for that possibility. True that i assumed you did not have a matured and crystallized higher purpose, for few among the people do, however it still accounts for what you have expressed. Did you lay out a plan to walk towards your higher purpose ? Is it assuring enough ? IS, the higher purpose being walked towards, via roads which are compatible with it ? Not the shortest routes maybe, but the most compatible ? For these make a lot of difference in terms of motivation for enduring day to day existence. –  unity100 Mar 22 at 22:16

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