Tag Info

Hot answers tagged

14

Day dreaming is a sequencing of ideas or thinking. I would advise you to start this when you are alone. It surely benefit you, however, always cross check what you are thinking.. and best place is google. :) It is due to lack of interest that you start day dreaming. When you are in classes, meetings and presentation. Prepare yourself and generate interest ...


12

Instigate curiosity. Make them ask. I usually use this as a personal technique to share a new idea. It gives me time to think of good arguments. "I've got a great idea!" "Cool. What is it?" "Yadda yadda about the basics and questionable changes." "But what about questionable change ? Won't this compromise something important ?" "I ...


12

Find a peer group that is productive. Seriously. Productivity is like running, or cycling, or a number of other individual sports that require a constant effort and benefit from peer interaction. It is fine to do solo runs, but spending some time with a pack can help get you motivated and will help you build up a good cadence.


12

There are many techniques publicised, but many of them seem to come back to connecting the name with some physical representation of the person. For example I might link the surname Smith with someone's very dark eyebrows and in my head link this as Blacksmith. This might sound a little silly, but in fact the sillier aspect you can use the better the brain ...


11

Have you watched "No arms, no legs, no worries"? Nick is one of my heroes. You sound like you are disappointed with yourself. Don't be. That kind of thinking is not productive. You have a long list of improvements that you want to do. That's good. Started with an easiest one. Rewrite that list sorted from easiest to hardest. Stick it on your door so that ...


10

Whoa ... slow down. :) Let's look at what you have. You have a great degree and a full-time job. Your basic needs and many of your wants are met. You've talked a lot about your weaknesses. What are your strengths? List those. (You don't have to tell us if you don't want to. This is for your benefit.) You have passions, right? Something that really ...


10

Whether to share or not is out of scope for this site. Regardless, you need to move on so you can concentrate. Write something down. On paper. Don't share it; you can decide whether to do later when you are less upset. Talk to friends/vent. Punch something if it makes you feel better. Try to practice concentrating on something fun like watching tv or ...


9

When I give talks, I always solicit honest feedback, and I can confirm your observation that it is hard to get. Here is what works well for me: Ask specific questions. You must have your own guesses, where the problems or the weaknesses might lie. If you ask "what do you think of this particular aspect, this might be problematic/worth improving, mightn't ...


8

Meditate and think on this... Why get angry if you can do something about what is making you angry? If you can do something about it, then do it! Also... why get angry about something you can do nothing about? If you cannot control the outcome / event, what is the point in getting angry about it? Do some looking in to buddhism for additional thoughts on ...


7

Definitely try to say simple things like hi and bye and bless you. You can even try it on total strangers. To not look too creepy, imagine that you already talked to this person before and he/she was nice to you, that'll take the weight off your shoulders. Try being genuinely interested in the other person. It will be hard at first at smalltalk, but use the ...


7

I'm in no way an expert to this, but these sound reasonable: Don't force conversations. Take it easy! Some people are introvert and some are extrovert; which means that some people like to talk, while others do not. And when you do talk, just be yourself... Do not interrupt your co-workers unless necessary. Interruptions slow down productivity. Get to know ...


7

Alberto Dell'Isola describes a few tricks to memorize names in Super Memória - você também pode ter uma - portuguese (no official translation to English). Listen. Everyone likes when others show interest in their names so it's alright to ask him to repeat it or comment how unusual it sounds. Repeat. Add his name a few times in the conversation, in the Good ...


7

A few idea; Making a Plus / Minus List Thiss a cool way to start with any decision. But all plus or all minus are not equal. Of course, they shouldn't be. Use a positive or negative number to weight each plus, minus and implication. When the list is complete, add up all the weights. Compare the totals of each choice and go with the largest one. In the case ...


7

At the end of the day, you can't force people to do what you need them to do, but there are ways you can encourage people to do so: Some ideas: Set clear expectations. One of the reason people procrastinate is that they aren't quite clear on what they're supposed to be doing or by when. For example, when your doctor promises to send your certificate, ask ...


7

Kramii's answer has a lot of good ideas for ways to manage the dependencies on other people, and improve your relationships with them so they're more likely to do what you need. The step I don't see there is one I find essential, keeping a "Waiting For" list. That's a list of all the things I'm waiting for other people to do. Most of the items on the list ...


7

You have listed a lot of typical symptoms of depression. Try to get medical opinion on this. Check out what assistance your health insurance gives you, or as SteveV says, check out the option of paying for treatment. Explain your feelings to friends and family. Ask them for help and advice. Make social interaction a priority, even when you don't feel in the ...


6

From How to Win Friends and Influence People: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People Don't criticize, condemn, or complain. Give honest and sincere appreciation. Arouse in the other person an eager want. Six Ways to Make People Like You Become genuinely interested in other people. Smile. Remember that a person's name ...


6

Another way is to send people invites on LinkedIn. Then you have a place where you can see peoples faces and names.


6

Seems to me your mind is clouded by negative thoughts. You should give mindfulness training a try. It's basically a very simple meditation technique (inspired by Buddhism) where you quietly sit down and focus on your breath, actively trying to eliminate all other thoughts. If done 7 minutes per day for a couple of weeks, this training has been shown to ...


6

Deciding you want to make a big change is half the battle. You may feel alone at times, but know that you're not. I'll be rooting for you! So will anyone else who is truly kind, even if it takes you a while to find those people. Here's what's helped me: Create a daily practice that becomes your rock. Make it your top priority besides basic survival and ...


6

Have you considered developing a strategy for handling the social networking sites instead of avoiding or abandoning them. The future seems to be buried in applications that fight for our attention. Also it is really hard to control what other people does. In some cases the applications send invitations automatically. You might find following steps helpful ...


5

Generally blocking social media makes people just go the route of using proxies and other methods to beat the system. A better way to do it is to encourage the use of social media, but also encourage balance, and specify that social media be used only for a certain amount of time/for a certain purpose. It is a bit difficult to find that balance, especially ...


5

So I'm of the school that fear is fear is fear. That the thing that your afraid of will be just as scary whatever you do. In my experience, the things I've found terrifying (kissing a girl, giving a presentation, entering a sports event) are in every-way equally horrific every single time… But this isn't about doom and gloom - what I do know is that you ...


5

How to Win Friends and Influence People has some wonderful ideas: Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say "You're Wrong." If you're wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. Begin in a friendly way. Start with ...


5

Some things that may help: Deep breaths and deep breathing Taking a walk Focusing on tasks rather than emotions Counting in your head Remove yourself from contentious situations Reflection on the triviality of most anger situations Reflection on suffering of others and my good fortune Buddhism and/or meditation Focus on patience to hear others out ...


5

Have no patience, Have a very low self confidence, Have become a negative thinker, Loosing focus on doing tasks or other things, Memory loss, easily forget things, Procrastination (even to post this question), Can't make decisions. sounds like a depression to me (but I am no expert). Would you consider a visit to a shrink? (try your best to find ...


5

The language you are using appears to me to be limiting your choices. The way you are describing your world shows that you have a "mental map" of it that is so limited, it is no surprise you are unhappy. So if you will allow me, I will respond to each self-description you provided by asking some probing questions: Whom or what do you "have no patience" ...


5

I have been there too and I have managed to solve these issues by taking away the origin. The things you describe in your question are the consequences. Focussing on the consequences won't solve your problem. Start doing the following: Go running every (other) day. If possible before work and not after work. If you don't like running, start anyway. After ...


4

Basic secrets: Smile and Eye contact How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie is a very good book on this subject.


4

In my experience, hard decisions occur when both options seem to be equally weighted in terms of pro's and con's. In these situations, there's no clear cut winner or loser, either way you choose will result in some benefit and some sacrifice as a result of not choosing the alternative option. Sometimes there isn't a right or best answer so we just have to ...



Only top voted, non community-wiki answers of a minimum length are eligible